We want what we have?

In my 20th birthday card, my mom wrote “what integrity and truth you bring to this world”. And in these words the characteristics I work to build in myself are solidified by the person who loves me, but more inportantly, knows me the most. It is truly special to learn that someone in such a position sees the things you strive for as things you already have. It opens the curtains to a whole new experience of consideration.  If I push, desire, wish for things that it seems I already have, what is it that I am so relentlessly wishing for, to no avail? Is it because I do not see them? This is most likely the case and I’m sure the case for nearly everyone. We see in others things that we wish we saw in ourselves and therefore assume that they are not in us. I’m sure, however, that if we asked our mothers, our best friends, to divulge just a few great things they saw in us, they would touch on the very things we hope for, wish for, work for. Maybe that makes us fortunate. If we thought we were too many of the things we respect, then we would never grow. We would scoff at others, look down on others from our pedestal of superior personhood and in doing so, would starve ourselves of the human experience. As frustrating as it may be to doubt our own greatness, we are best off if we can assume that those we care about see it, and in the meantime, try to become great enough to deserve their praises.